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Can’t we all just quilt-a-long?

April 30th, 2011

Gotta get this off my chest before my bra rips apart at the seams (it’s already a tight squeeze in there). A real shit bomb has been dropped on our beautiful quilting/crafting/sewing community recently. All the negativity and meanness I’ve seen displayed recently has given me the vomits - especially when there are kind, decent and talented people being targeted in a rampage of thoughtless comments. Way too much “keeping it real” being slung.  Making a disparaging remark about someone’s artwork or fabric or pattern or book or style or where they buy their fabric or technique or whatever is not ok just because it’s followed by a “just keeping it real”.  Keeping it polite will make you sleep good at night.

I realize the rampage of mean and ugly comments/posts are the minority - and by speaking up… I hope to increase the love and decrease the hate.  I cringe at the thought of a new blogger or a new sew/quilter being intimidated by mean comments or posts - whether it be to blog, tweet, flickr or join a guild. The overwhelming majority of quilters, sewers and crafters are really, really, really nice people.  It’s so cliche, but the more the merrier.


A few of my own personal “rules of the road” when it comes to blogging (and commenting), and if it encourages just even one person to jump on board and enjoy the ride… I hope I do that.

1. I blog for me and I treat my blog as a journal and a failing memory back-up system. Getting comments and meeting people via comments I get, and most of all - the friendships born of it… that’s gravy.   I could care less about “following” and hit counting.  For me it’s all about the quality of my friendships, not the quantity.  I blog because I like to blog, not because I have to.  Period.

2. I always try to leave comments for others, and also try to read the comments left for others. When I first started blogging, it was easier to visit blogs because  there were only a few dozen crafty blogs at the time.  Now I have hundreds of favorites and it’s hard to keep up, but I try. I found one of my very best friends in the whole world because I read a comment she left on someone’s blog.
Where In The World is PamKittyMorning???

3. I LOVE show and tell! I think anyone who’s in a guild will agree… show and tell is the favorite part of the meeting! I love to see what people are making, what people are doing, where they went, who they saw. One of my all time favorite “field trip” reads was on Lisa Boyer’s blog when she took us to the post office.  Sharing is not bragging.  Bragging is not sharing.  Sharing is sharing.  Period.

3a. I love to see what people are working on - why I show what I’m working on.

3b. I love seeing peeks into people’s homes and where they live - why I show mine.
Measuring Astoria

3c. I love seeing places people go, especially if I can’t go there myself - why I show mine.
Vancouver 2010

3d. I love seeing what’s on the other side of the camera - why I show mine. (aka the good use of “keepin’ it real”)
My garage-o-hell

4. I am me. I want to be positive, inspiring, friendly and polite. Being positive, inspiring, friendly and polite does not make me a phoney. It’s the same way I treat people visiting in my home, or at the grocery store, or the DMV, or that nice kid at Staples who was so friendly and helpful. To that a-hole driver who cut me off on US 101… meh, you not so much.

5. On my blog and in my 3D life… I celebrate all quilting, all fabrics, all resources.  Not everything is my cup of coffee, but I’ll keep that to myself.  Just keepin’ it polite.

6. Tell people that I took notice… and fixed my reader feed to show in-full in Google Reader. Seriously, I had no idea it was so irritating - I guess I needed to check my own blog in my reader sooner!

7. Tell Google that it’d be nice if they’d updated all the blogspot blogs with an email field in the Name/URL option so non-blogspot people like myself can stop being called “no-reply bloggers”.   TIA, Google.

8. Continue apologizing for having an inbox that looks like an episode of Hoarders and sucking at emailing.

9.  Share some damn good reads:
- Katy’s my opinions are mine and mine alone
- Amanda’s Reality Check
- Sarah’s Easter, and a Little Rant
- Krista’s No take-backs

10. Tell people my son and daughter in-law flipped a U-ie and chased down that car in their neighborhood to take a pic of the IQUILT (New South Wales) plate for me.  Best Mom’s Day card ever!

Ok. I’m done. And my girls are happy now that there’s more room in the bra.

Edited in:
I think there might be some confusion with the way I wrote my post - but all this isn’t about me, it’s about what’s going in Internetlandia right now… flickr groups, blog posts, comments on blogs, comments on Amazon, Facebook posts and comments - it’s a whole bunch of stink in a whole bunch of places. I personally haven’t been hit (that I know of, that is!), but I take it personally that our beloved, creative and kind community has. I just can’t sit quiet while good people get crapped on, as well as all the negativity that might potentially discourage any new quilters and/or bloggers from jumping in. This isn’t about me. This is about all of us.

Posted in Stuff |

202 Responses

  1. The fabulous De allegedly said:

    you crack me up! and I am with you sister on the “keepin’ it polite” ~ not sure why people have to try bring everyone down in the hole where they are…I’m very happy in my own little world, thank you very much!! Now that you’ve gotten that off your chest (can you say “freedom”??) I hope you have a blessed rest of the weekend!!

  2. The fabulous Elisa allegedly said:

    You rule! I’m just sayin’

  3. The fabulous Sherri allegedly said:

    So wonderfully said! Love the “keepin’ it polite” motto, too! Have a great weekend!

  4. The fabulous Melody allegedly said:

    Great post! I too have many opinions but subscribe to the ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, then keep it to yourself’ mantra. I love the phrase “Keepin’ it Polite”. If I did not tell you before, You Totally Rock!

  5. The fabulous Mary allegedly said:

    It’s way too easy in the internet age to be hurtful and it almost seems brave to be nice! Thanks for sharing your life with us! When I have a blog, I’ll be sure to let you know!

  6. The fabulous Kim Walus allegedly said:

    I KNEW I LOVED YOU!!! I totally agree with every single word you typed and I hope everyone in the world reads this post. If you don’t mind, I will spread the quilty love by referring to your wonderful post on my blog. I can’t wait to see you at Market too!!!

  7. The fabulous Jen in NY allegedly said:

    I love it! *Clap* *Clap* *Clap* Very, very well said, Monica.

  8. The fabulous Mary on Lake Pulaski allegedly said:

    Thanks friend. Keep those girls happy.

  9. The fabulous pam allegedly said:

    I super ??? you. xo

  10. The fabulous Laurie allegedly said:

    I love you, Monica, but you already knew that…at least I hope you know how much I love you :) I feel bad for people who can’t just enjoy what others are doing. I say, if you don’t like it don’t go there.

  11. The fabulous Mary Anne Drury allegedly said:

    AMEN SISTER !!!! I am SO tired of hearing rude comments …. I really really REALLY cannot stand rude !!! OR getting “constructive criticism” whether asked for or not !!! Live and let live …. and as my mother always says “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!” AND since reality can really suck sometimes, I need my blog to be my blissful little escape from reality … my blog, my fantasy! Mayberry here I come !!!

  12. The fabulous Anita allegedly said:

    Well said!

  13. The fabulous Connie allegedly said:

    From your pal formerly aka Cootie Bug), I just want to say that I think you’re right on. I can’t imagine doing anything other than enjoying your blog! I’ve always loved it and been a big fan. Big hugs,
    Connie (W) H

  14. The fabulous Allison allegedly said:

    amen sista. :) -Allison

  15. The fabulous Anne allegedly said:

    Thanks for the post! I have to say that I read one of these, getting it off my chest blog postings and was surprised after I commented on not understanding a particular line of fabric, that I was surprised at how it could have been perceived as negative but my comment along with others in context made mine feel really negative. I then finally thought about it and decided to take another look at the fabric line and discovered that I had seen it all wrong. Of course the name still doesn’t speak to me or bring that image to mind, but that’s okay. As I had said there’s a lot I don’t understand about quilting. But perhaps it’ll all become more clear after doing my first quilt…. you know the one that I keep fondling the fabric for but don’t actually cut.

  16. The fabulous Kristen allegedly said:

    Posts like this make me all warm and fuzzy inside. I started blogging because of fun and happy people like yourself. Thanks Monica! xoxo

  17. The fabulous Anne allegedly said:

    Glad you posted to by the way! Missed your thoughts. Can’t wait to hear how everything goes at quilt market!

  18. The fabulous Debbie St. Germain allegedly said:

    Keeping it real? Never heard anyone doing that. I am of the thought, that if I have nothing good to say, I keep my mouth shut, lol. But you can pick on me anytime, I like constructive criticism;)


  19. The fabulous Liz Boswell allegedly said:

    ::::::three snaps in a circle with a little bit of trailorhood attitude:::: you go girl! (mauh) Liz

  20. The fabulous Georgia allegedly said:

    Hooray! Love the part about ‘keeping it real’. Yes, people are entitled to their own opinions, but it’s no excuse for bad manners.
    (didn’t even notice that that was a NSW number plate until you said!)

  21. The fabulous Karen allegedly said:

    the only nastiness I have been hearing lately is about where you buy your fabric from and that the only “good” fabric is from a quilt shop and all else isn’t worth the money you spend on it.
    I guess I have not read the blogs that the nasty stuff is at and I’m glad I haven’t! People do not treat others with the respect that they themselves want.

  22. The fabulous terri allegedly said:

    Well done! We need to treat others as we want to be treated. It would be such a treat for the children if adults would act like caring loving people.

  23. The fabulous Darci Wright allegedly said:

    Well said! Thank you, you made my day!

  24. The fabulous mean sarah jean allegedly said:

    I too have seen a lot of negative energy in quilt-land. I don’t belong to any guild, and have thought of the online community as my quilting community. It makes me sad to see so many of my reads lashing out at those who have a different method in quilting, or preference in fabric. I have reconsidered keeping them as reads because of this. I don’t need their negativity clouding my creative process. I was always taught that if I didn’t have anything nice to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. I’m glad you shared your thoughts on the situation with us. I have thought about doing the same.
    That license plate rocks! what a great son you have!

  25. The fabulous Sharon allegedly said:

    Three cheers(or more) to you for saying it like it is!!!!! PKM must have been visiting you when she joined the “crew”!

  26. The fabulous Jona allegedly said:

    This is why I love you Monica. Here we have this beautiful community of people who just share the love of making things with fabric. We come from every racial, economic, and political background and yet we get together and truly love and respect each other. And then someone has to go and barf all over our meeting. Aren’t things hard enough right now? Let’s be extra nice.

  27. The fabulous badlands quilts allegedly said:

    I love, love, love how you focused on good practices and did not give excess attention to the rant…

    PS: And I rspecially love your garage photo - looks like my storage room that I am staying up all night to clean so I can finally sew tomorrow!

  28. The fabulous CaraQuilts allegedly said:

    I’m so sad that this whole drama has gotten worse. I did a post back in March about the whole “dumbing down” crap, and am so sad to see attacks getting worse, and on people who are sweet and have nothing to do.
    The anonymity of the internet is apparently to alluring to those cowards and bullies who like to build themselves up by tearing others down.
    Good for you for standing up to them!

  29. The fabulous carolbrowne allegedly said:

    I *heart* you, Happy Zombie. That is all.


    Go Nad Go!

  30. The fabulous MelanieO allegedly said:

    Thank you for putting it into words so eloquently and entertainingly. Agree :)

  31. The fabulous laurie allegedly said:

    Hugs and kisses.

  32. The fabulous Nedra- Cactus Needle allegedly said:

    Amen, Amen and Amen!

  33. The fabulous Toni allegedly said:

    Love #10…thanks for the laugh!

  34. The fabulous Kelly allegedly said:

    Monica, AMEN! I love your site. It is always the first one that I surf when I have time. You site always makes me smile whether it is what you write about or the pictures you post. The first thing that I tell a person that goes to a quilt show for the first time with me is “never say anything negitive. You never know if the person next to you is the artist.” Keep up the good work! kelly

  35. The fabulous Megan allegedly said:

    I’ve said the same thing on every blogger who has posted a post like this (and there have been a ton!)
    If we all liked the same stuff, it would get BORING. My stuff isn’t perfect by a long shot; my points NEVER match; but that is me.
    I agree, if you can’t say something nice, smile and move on!

  36. The fabulous Mary Ann allegedly said:

    And not only negative but they are so self righteous about it all. I love most of the crafty blogs. I stop reading those that are critical or mean. I out grew mean along time ago and wouldn’t let my kids grow up with that attitude either. PS I love the title of this post…wonder how many folks got it it!! oops was that mean??? PSS My garage looks like that too. PSSS The needlecase is cute if hiding its fancy front!

  37. The fabulous jaybird allegedly said:


    thank you SO much for writing this post. you said many things i’ve wanted to say… but didn’t know how to put it all together.

    each time i read one of the posts you are talking about i thought of being a kid… and my mom saying “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” yes we all need some constructive criticism sometimes but there is a time and a place & how it is all going down these days is NOT the way.

    love you & see you soon in SLC.

  38. The fabulous Kate allegedly said:

    Very well said. I think I missed most of the hoo-hass, but its sad when stuff like that goes on. We all have different likes and dislikes, and its a bummer that some people seem to think that their ideas are the best/only/right ones…

  39. The fabulous Nikki allegedly said:

    I couldn’t agree more with all that you said. I cringe when I read the negative stuff. And it definitely discourages me from keeping some blogs in my reader…

    And as always, thanks for the humor. ;)

  40. The fabulous amylouwho allegedly said:

    I ditto you and everyone else here! If you can’t say something nice, keep it to yourself. And I always used ‘keeping it real’ when I showed an uncropped shot and you get to see the mess. I like that kind of keeping it real. It’s late and I’m rambling, but I love you for this post. And for me, esp. #1 and sharing is sharing.

  41. The fabulous Betty @ She's Sew Pretty allegedly said:

    I like your rules! I’m probably the same way. I haven’t had any negativity thrown my way but heck…haven’t really had a lot of attention at all. Anywhoooo…I like your style. Sewing and otherwise!

  42. The fabulous Laura allegedly said:

    Kudos, Monica! There’s so much negativity in the world, I look to my crafty blog reads for escapism. Hate it when the mofos try to ruin it for everyone.

    It’s always nice to have a voice of reason cut through the fluff. Thanks!

  43. The fabulous Mishka allegedly said:

    Thanks for changing your blog settings. Re-subscribing!

  44. The fabulous Megan allegedly said:

    Thanks for giving your own take on this subject. I agree with all points made. I’ve really wanted to do my own little post on this subject but frankly it has emotionally exhausted me to the point of no words (must have something to do with being almost 8 months preggo!). Oh, and the comment you left on Katy’s blog this morning nearly made me pee myself (which isn’t really hard to do these days, but still) Thanks for the belly laugh!

  45. The fabulous Eugenia allegedly said:

    Well said. Thank you. I only read nice bloggers because life is too short and my free time does not allow for mean people.

  46. The fabulous Monica allegedly said:

    WOW!!! what a great post! XOXOXOXOXO
    you really nailed it! I follow a bunch of quilt blogs- and I agree, if you can’t say something nice- just keep it to yourself. Plus I still don’t get what is up with this “no-reply” google blogger stuff.
    Monica is the best name BTW…. :-D

  47. The fabulous Anita allegedly said:

    Don’t ever change, please.

  48. The fabulous Debbie allegedly said:

    Fantastic post. Thanks much.

  49. The fabulous SarahB allegedly said:

    I really am loving the positive posts! Thank you for reinforcing we all need to build each other up. Treating everyone the way we want to be treated is the true “keeping it real” — the other stuff is just plain mean.

  50. The fabulous Annette allegedly said:

    Such a great post! So beautifully said. This quilting/blogging thing has been a fun thing for me. I’ve loved being a part of it and learned tons. We should be so supportive and encouraging of each other and there could be no end to the good we could do.

  51. The fabulous Karen allegedly said:

    Now that’s keeping it real :) We should be encouraging and thankful people share their lives and projects with us. If you have nothing nice to say, GET A LIFE then maybe your attitude will change ! Thank you for sharing your projects and thoughts with us.

  52. The fabulous Melody allegedly said:

    I could not agree more. If everyone treated everyone else the way they would like to be treated the world would be a much better place. I’m really lucky I’ve never read any of these mean comments and I don’t ever want to.
    Please keep being your lovely, kind friendly self - you are one of the blogging worlds goodies.

  53. The fabulous Kimberly allegedly said:

    Well said, Monica!

    I admit, I did post a comment to one of ‘those’ posts… to say that I’m saddened that blogging has gotten so huge that the bigger fish never seem to have time to respond to/visit the littler ones. I cherish the comments left to my blog and if it ever got so big that I couldn’t handle it, well then maybe blogging would no longer be for me. I really hope I never get there.

    I had also planned to stop by here today to let you know that I posted a link to your ‘itty bitty poochie bags’ today… and to say thanks again for being such a creative and generous person!

    Take care, Kimberly

  54. The fabulous Shari allegedly said:

    Well said, well said! I’m so happy you did this! Smooches!!!

  55. The fabulous Bridgette allegedly said:

    I knew the minute I saw your blog that I had met a new friend! Colorful,positive, a tad bit crazy…just like me!
    I think what happens is women tend to make everything into a popularity contest, and I’m 30 years past that.
    Life is hard enough as it is, let’s all hold hands and quilt :)
    P.S. I have a little show and tell over at my place, you’re welcome to stop by :)

    And BTW, won’t you be in SLC soon?

  56. The fabulous Sivje allegedly said:

    You already know I think you are pretty wonderful, however why did you post a picture of my garage???? Because I think I would remember if you had been to my house! I LOVE this post! I hope I have not been negative. I have not been on Twitter or most other things lately so I am not sure what all the hoopla is about but I am glad you posted this because I it was great!
    I hope you have a beautiful May Day!

  57. The fabulous Tammy allegedly said:

    You take the bra right off for pete sakes, well said. those whom share negativity of other are just jelouse so poo poo to them.

    p.s. i am a crappy speller so just laugh with me not at me

  58. The fabulous Bari allegedly said:

    At fall market, I noticed that when you walk into a room you light it up, and suddenly all the people there are pulled to you. This is why that happens… Your heart is huge. Which also explains the bra strap issue. Love you, M. See you soon!

  59. The fabulous Jules allegedly said:

    Brilliantly written and exactly my way of thinking…….even if someone makes something that isn’t my style/fabrics or just not my thing, I can still appreciate the work, effort and love that they’ve poured into the project and that deserves my respect in the form of polite comments, at the very least.
    I love looking round other people’s blogs too, it broadens my horizons :) and I always come away smiling just like I am this morning reading your post, thanks for a great blog :) and I’m glad your girls have a bit more space now :)

  60. The fabulous Leslie Schmidt allegedly said:

    There is so much tragedy and heartache in the world, I come to places like your blog to get up-lifted (no, not referring to your girls) not depressed by insensitivity or crassness or nastiness. Quilting is so inspiring and soul-satisfying. And everyone’s different, which doesn’t mean good or bad. There is so much to be gained from the cheerful exchange of hearts and minds, why would anyone want to be negative?

    By the way, you have your son well trained.

    Thanks for voicing this in the typical Happy Zombie style!

  61. The fabulous Katy allegedly said:

    Amen, sistah. Constructive criticism, advice (when asked) I embrace, and I love - heck knows I need it too. I love this community - I loved going to my first market and feeling like we were all just the oldest of friends. I want anyone to read my blog and know they can shoot me an email with a random question, or a ‘I’m in the neighbourhood, fancy a coffee?’
    If it wasn’t for blogging I’d have never met of my best friends in the real world either.

    Thanks for making me dribble coffee down my shirt at the sight of Pam in a prison van. She kind of looks at home in there…that’s worrying….

    Oh - and another thing, I’m pretty damn sure those girls have no room in there. Sheesh. Puppies? More like cattle……

  62. The fabulous CraftyCripple allegedly said:

    I love this post, in particular the number plate! I think I’ve been lucky that so far I’ve not witnessed this kind of negativity because I am relatively new to reading quilting blogs. I really hope that I continue to avoid the negative and witness the polite. If you don’t like something on a blog then dong read it. No one is holding your eyelids open with clamps!

  63. The fabulous Sarah allegedly said:

    Go Monica! It always saddens me when I read of nastiness online. When I talk to my 2 daughters about bullying at school and all those friendship issues young girls face I would love to say to them that it gets better as you get older, but sadly it doesn’t. Good on you speaking up and for not just standing by.

  64. The fabulous Sabine allegedly said:

    Thumbs up, liebe Monica!
    Great post!!! ;o)
    Have a lovely Sunday!
    Sabine xxx

  65. The fabulous Sew Create It - Jane allegedly said:

    Great post! I can’t add more than you’ve said as you’ve said it so well..just wanted to give you a comment of support and a thumbs up! :o)

  66. The fabulous Rebecca allegedly said:

    Monica thank you for saying what I have found to be true. The VAST majority of quilters/sewers/crafters are incredibly kind, down to Earth, generous people. Generous with their knowledge, and generous with their support of me and anything I’m working on.

    I’m glad your girls can rest now. That is no way to go through Mother’s Day!

  67. The fabulous Kim allegedly said:

    Yes! When I read The Post That Started It All I thought, damn, there is some high school s*** happening here. EVERYONE has tastes and preferences, in fabric and quilting style and music and art and people and everything. You are NOT cool or punk or “keeping it real” for putting something down because it’s popular. (And blog-popular has little to no correlation in the 3D world. 95% of my friends and family have no clue who Anna Maria Horner is, and 99% have no clue who Aneela Hoey is.) So putting down people because you think they’re too big or famous to read the internet and find your commentary, well that’s just short-sighted.


  68. The fabulous Stina allegedly said:

    Monica… This was the best blogpost i have read in a long time!!!
    Thank heavens for people like you… :0)
    Think I got more room in my bra too…lol
    And thanks for the full post showing… Love!!

  69. The fabulous DianeP allegedly said:

    Thank you for the beautiful, positive post this morning! The world is a hard enough place and quilters have found a little space of their own to be happy and have fun. Thank you for protecting it and for all the sharing you do for us.

    Here’s what I try to remember every day - Be kind - everyone is having a hard time.

  70. The fabulous KathiD allegedly said:

    Agree, agree, agree, agree times sixty bazillion!

    Don’t you notice how much nicer people are when you are nice to them? Don’t you notice how much happier you are when you’re nice and they are nice and nobody is trying to pound each other into the ground? So why do people feel the need to be nasty?

    You make me smile!

  71. The fabulous Cindy allegedly said:

    Monica…I have always said, and will continue to say, you are my hero. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. You inspire me like no other! Swear. Cross my heart. XOXOXO

  72. The fabulous Amy allegedly said:

    As a newbie (sewing, crafting, & blogging) I appreciate every one of your “rules.”

    I rarely leave comments but I read a lot of sewing/crafting blogs. I think I will attempt to leave more comments, as you do, so others know I appreciate what I see.

    Speaking of which, thank you so much for changing your blog settings in Google Reader! When I open up my Reader the first blog I check is the Happy Zombie. I love it!!!

  73. The fabulous sarah allegedly said:

    there are a crapton of comments here, but this breastfeeding, one handed typing mama thanks you for changing the reader feed settings. i never have time to click through!

  74. The fabulous Jill allegedly said:

    I LOVE your post! You woulnd’t open someone’s journal and critique it…why do it here! I was terrified starting a blog, a new quilter, putting myself out there. Lucky me? I get very few comments, the ones I have received are encouraging. Thanks for reminding people out there that keepin it real isn’t the freedom to say rude things!

  75. The fabulous Cheri allegedly said:

    Great post and thank you, I echo all of your thoughts and reasons for my own little fledgling blog. It is more my journal and the friends I have made from it I treasure. I removed the followers list from it, it is not about number to me.
    Back to quilting,

  76. The fabulous Katrina Kahn allegedly said:

    I absolutely love your post! I must have missed a lot of this negativity - or just blocked it out LOL! I think that the quilting world has room enough for everyone - and room enough for all techniques and styles - wouldn’t the world be a boring place if we all HAD to please everyone all of the time?

    Thanks for Keepin’ it Real!

  77. The fabulous Kaye Prince allegedly said:

    I totally agree with you Monica which you probably know (oh wait, did you see the post I wrote last week?)! People need to stop with the nastiness because they’re driving me crazy!

  78. The fabulous Jen Eskridge allegedly said:

    Well said. I love to blog. I do it to support my sewing business, but mostly I do it just to do it. I recently read a “keeping it real” post and instantly thought “wow, I hope those designers who took all that time to draw and promote their fabric don’t read this.” I’m not a fan of the mean-internet. I much prefer the fun-internet!

  79. The fabulous Christy F allegedly said:

    I like your style! You are right on target - and there is ALWAYS something nice that can be said, be it re: color selection, style, pattern, technic, etc. I don’t understand putting the negative out there just because one is not face to face and doesn’t have to really “own” up to it. Keep up the great work, and carry on! :)

  80. The fabulous Suzanne allegedly said:

    I quit going to a quilt shop when I was just starting to quilt because they were down right rude. It felt like I was trying to join a club but obviously wasn’t good enough got them. They never complimented anything I did. But one of the quilts won 3rd place in my county fair, the biggest one in the state, so it must have been decent! Thankfully I found a shop that oohed and ahhed and gave me good, constructive advice. They always encourage me. I love encouraging new quilters now. Like you said it may not be what I’d do but WHO CARES?! Thanks for posting on this. It happens to a lot of us.

  81. The fabulous elsa allegedly said:

    Best post, to date, on this whole rigamaroll about this issue. It really burns me up that people give themselves the permission to criticize other peoples work. Think it has something to do with the impersonal nature of the internet and just being mean spirited.
    I always like what Thumper said to Bambi, ‘if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all’ (or something like that).
    I know with my own blog I put my heart out there with the different crafts I like to do and some personal things too. If someone were to come in and say something negative would be very sad. So far that hasn’t happened (thank goodness).
    Great post, thanks Monica!

  82. The fabulous amy allegedly said:

    Amen, sistah! If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. I suppose the people who never heard that as a kid WOULD end up spewing whatever comes to mind. To me it’s all about the sharing and taking people’s posts at face value — assuming the best of people (until proven otherwise), not inferring bragginess. I adore that we share, I adore getting to “know” people online, I adore getting inspired and seeing what’s happening out there. Fabulous post!

  83. The fabulous Anne Heidi allegedly said:

    Great post Monica! I don’t understand why some people are so mean- they can’t feel very good about themselves at the end of the day.
    Hope you have a great week!

  84. The fabulous Bonny Schmid allegedly said:

    Good for you! I agree MEAN PEOPLE SUCK!
    There are way too many of them out there!

  85. The fabulous Erin allegedly said:

    I totally agree. If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all, is a good rule to live by. My blog is just as much for me as it is for readers/ comments. I was so happy I had it recently when our computer crashed and I lost some of my quilt pics. I could just go back and get them from my blog. I love quilting and will quilt how and with what I like! Great post!


  86. The fabulous ScrappyNancy allegedly said:

    *Keeping it real*…The ultimate *I’m smarter than you* statement. Chances are pretty good that the Reality Police just have a different perspective. Express opinion as opinion, thank you very much!

  87. The fabulous Kelly allegedly said:

    thanks so much for this post! i agree with everything you’ve said! i’ve read some of the negative blog posts, but overall, i’ve tried to just stay out of it all. i do what i do, i like what i do, and i don’t really care if people think what i’ve done is dumbed down or not. it’s not worth the time and frustration i feel by reading all that stuff!

  88. The fabulous MichelleB allegedly said:

    Curse words in a Happy Zombie post - what I live for! Great post, my dear.

  89. The fabulous Aubrey allegedly said:

    Well said about the “keepin’ it polite”. I also wonder what happened to the etiquette of, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

    The internet gives us a great place to meet other quilters/sewers from ALL over the world! But it is sad to see that it also gives a sense of “power” to the naysayers.

    One of the most amazing things about the quilting community is the unique camaraderie and encouragement that exists throughout the industry.

    In the end, I sure hope the larger quilting/sewing community does not let all this negativity affect that atmosphere of welcoming and positivity.

  90. The fabulous Gerry allegedly said:

    Yep, you’ve got it just right!

  91. The fabulous Keiko allegedly said:

    I totally agree! A big hug to you! more hugs coming in SLC!!!

  92. The fabulous Leslie allegedly said:

    I have come to expect nastiness on my other 2 blogs (political), but I would never have guessed it would infiltrate the world of sewing, crafting, cooking, etc. I have yet to come upon this, though I believe I will say a prayer for whomever is so unhappy in life they feel the need to ravage others. I am happy I found your blog, as I have gotten some good tips and inspirations. I wish you a blessed day!

  93. The fabulous Jewel allegedly said:

    Holey Shemoly until I read the driver on US-101 comment I didn’t realize you lived so close to me. That is awesome. So many talented people around here. I have to agree with all that you said. I don’t comment as often as I should but I am making an effort to do more. I don’t like negativity at all. I agree there is way too much going on out there. I always say “Give someone a hand up not a smack down”. Thanks for hte post! It made my morning.

  94. The fabulous Lynne @ lilysquilts allegedly said:

    Thumbs up from me too - I’m on your side of the fence - when Katy said - let’s just play nice, that says it all for me. But, BTW, I really really do like your fabric line and I’m not just sayin it, I really do!!!

  95. The fabulous blop allegedly said:

    Once again, you hit a home run! As one of our friends’ says…that’s why they make chocolate, strawberry & vanilla…something for everyone!! xoxo

  96. The fabulous Kristyne allegedly said:

    Monica, I heart you. I’m a really new blogger and I feel like the new kid on the block. I suffer from a lifelong case of insecurity which is now just so unattractive on a 43 year old wife & mom and I’m working really hard to get over caring what other people think … but never to the point of being rude. I need some of whatever it is you’ve got! I admit that all this negativity was starting to get to me. I was letting myself feel … yucky about things.

    But yours was one of the first blogs I ever read (I discovered you through Blogging for Bliss) and I respect you greatly as a crafter, quilter, designer, blogger and just all around super nice/funny person. Reading your post today really helped things settle in my mind. Thank you. Really. Glad your bra is happy now too. :)

  97. The fabulous Michelle C. allegedly said:

    Love it! you are dead on! and thats why I follow your blog. you inspire me, and your sense of humor and “real” are refreshing. Thanks!

  98. The fabulous Natalia allegedly said:

    Monica, I totally agree with you! I have been blown away by some of the negativity that is out there lately. Really, aren’t we all just trying to do our best.. Isn’t this “just a hobby” for many of us? Why do some people have to be so negative? :)

    I do enjoy reading your blog because you are so real! :)

  99. The fabulous Meg allegedly said:

    Perfect post, Monica. Seriously, the snark factor out there in the blog-o-sphere has really gotten out of control. Thanks for being you–open, warm, friendly, and just plain awesome.

  100. The fabulous Agnes allegedly said:

    This world needs more people with your outlook! You are awesome.

  101. The fabulous Tammy allegedly said:

    My Grandma always said if you can’t say something nice, don’t say it at all - a good motto to live by esp in this day and age with blogs and facebook, etc. Leaving nasty or hurtful comments is not only rude, but it really shows the kind of person you are and it doesn’t show you in a good light. The world is so full of negative things, why can’t we uplift and support each other is how I feel - well said on your part!!

  102. The fabulous Karin allegedly said:

    Well said, well said!!! You had me LOL at the ‘busting out’ comment. You are too funny :) Love your work and love your blog, keep it up!

  103. The fabulous Hollie allegedly said:

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for such a refreshing post. Well said!

  104. The fabulous Kate allegedly said:

    ou all have me stumped, I must be surrounding myself only with amazing bloggers and friends. I have never even seen one negative comment come through for me or about others. I am sorry to hear there is this back door sadness going on. I think we all have to move forward and be reminded how little time we all have left on this planet. I love those around me with all of my heart. I love your note even though it sounded like you are sad and have to justify who you are. love kate

  105. The fabulous AnnieO allegedly said:

    You always come across as totally genu-wine to me, Monica! I like all your reasons for blogging and feel much the same about my blog. I also blog because I mostly quilt alone and want to be part of a larger community of creative and wonderful peeps–like you!

  106. The fabulous Beth allegedly said:

    Monica, you’ve really helped me today! Lately I have that “why don’t more people comment on my blog?” feeling. I’ve been in this space for almost 5 years and usually get less than 10 comments per post…

    …but today I read this post and thought, “Do I really care?” I have a handful of bloggy friends who visit me regularly and I reciprocate and there is something of depth in our relationships. And today you’ve made me realize that’s enough!

  107. The fabulous Felecia allegedly said:

    Fantabulous, Monica! First time reader and this was a bit of fresh air on a Sunday morning. I do believe Ms. Jane Austen would be proud - although she might frown a bit at the referral of bosoms (or in this case, “my girls”). I on-the-other-hand fully applaud the use. My girls aren’t quite as ample and so I tend to leave things on my chest just in hopes that it perks things up a bit. FYI - it doesn’t work. Awesome blog!

  108. The fabulous Michele allegedly said:

    Brilliant! Let’s all have fun!

  109. The fabulous Laura K allegedly said:

    Thank you for speaking up. I have seen several quilt bloggers recently talking about rude comments and it has made me sad. Whatever happened to that age old advice, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all”?

  110. The fabulous Cherri House allegedly said:

    I love you Monica, you practice what you preach, and you make the blog world a better place to be.


  111. The fabulous Jean allegedly said:

    Well said, Monica! All the negative talks, in particular the subject of “dumbing down” quilting is very annoying. If anyone creates anything, whether it is easy or uber-difficult should be applauded, not critisized. If I don’t like someone’s choice of fabric I can look beyond that as a personal preferrence and applaud their skill and their pattern choice. My life is so hectic that I don’t get much sewing done, whether it be easy or difficult. So if someone makes something that someone else thinks is too easy, they are way ahead of me and lots of others.

    Let’s be kind to each other out their, quilting sisters!!!

  112. The fabulous rachel griffith allegedly said:

    *standing ovation*

    i heart you woman.

  113. The fabulous Krista - Poppyprint allegedly said:

    hip, hip hooray. I’m so happy we’ve met online and look forward to finding ’someone in the middle’ to organize the west coast symposium of crafting hearts. I loved what you wrote about hiding behind nasty with a ‘keeping it real’ free pass. Like I said, no take-backs. If you’re putting it out there, you’ve gotta own it!

    I find it so interesting that apparently I have hundreds of followers who’ve never commented before on my work, or what I share with them, but they’ve come out of the woodwork to ‘talk’ to me about this honesty post. hmmm.

  114. The fabulous jill allegedly said:

    thank you for this post! i feel like i’ve been surrounded with negativity from various outlets for a week now. whether it be “trying to be helpful” comments about people’s work or complaining about the royal wedding/those who watched or basic downright nastiness, it just seems to be all over. it’s tiring and toxic and we need better than that!

  115. The fabulous Shannon allegedly said:

    That made my day!!!
    Thanks for being you!

  116. The fabulous Genevieve Gail allegedly said:

    I hear ya, Sista! Great post!

  117. The fabulous Julie Stewart allegedly said:

    Glad there is room for the girls!Mama’s need to teach their cowgirls manners! See you in SLC!!

  118. The fabulous Michelle Balletti allegedly said:

    I can’t believe people out there are so rude to post a negative comment…HEY PEOPLE, if you don’t like what you read or see, don’t go back to the blog!! Plain and simple!! I love reading the blogs that share a little bit about the bloggers!! Sure I’ve deleted some blogs that I found weren’t up “my alley” but never said anything negative, just stopped reading it…that’s all….If you don’t have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all and keep it moving…btw, love your blog and stalk (oops read) it every day!!!

  119. The fabulous Donna allegedly said:

    thanks…well said!

  120. The fabulous Jackie allegedly said:

    Great post, Ms. Zombie!! I am in total agreement with you… no lie and keepin it real. But best of all I am so glad there is more room in your bra, unless you have a small teacup doggie in there?? Love the plate, mine says QUILTN and it was a Mom’s day gift to me 3 years ago! See you in SLC.

  121. The fabulous WendyMT allegedly said:

    Can I say I luv ya??? You rock and I’d love to share a link to this post if you would so permit…. Thanks for the words I couldn’t put so eloquently!!

  122. The fabulous Leslie Sorenson allegedly said:

    You are right on. I blog to share happy memories, projects and comments on life in general. Before I hit “publish”, I always ask myself “If the whole world decides to read this about you, is it okay?”. Then I hit the button. I read blogs to be inspired and to join in to other’s happiness as they share their creativity.

  123. The fabulous Marcia Mersky allegedly said:

    Right on!

  124. The fabulous Joy allegedly said:

    T H A N K ~ Y O U .. For stepping out.

    I really hate it when say they are just being real.. and they say something hurtful, there is NO reason for it.

  125. The fabulous Lori allegedly said:

    I group “JKIR” with mothers-in-law who are “Just telling you how they feel” & over-opinionated goons who “don’t want to blow smoke”.
    Ms. Manners never EVER preached lying. Even white lying.
    Just be polite, all-y’all!

    I hate to think that in my own absence of mind I’ve hurt someone. No, I don’t agree politically with some people. I tire of fabrics with filigrees. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a re-purposed denim project I like. And there’s enough room on the web for me to get my own blog. But I’m not going to go hate on someone else’s blog.
    Ohmigosh, I have so much to say on this.
    Let’s just all be positive, eh!?

  126. The fabulous Lori allegedly said:

    And I echo #52 Melody, #101 Tammy, #118 Michelle Balletti

    …and #99, Meg for using the word “Snarky”.

  127. The fabulous Molly allegedly said:

    Thank you from the bottom of my heart! I missed all the bad vibes, but I have been hearing all the wonderful people who’ve spoken out against it. I need to come back and read all your wonderful commenters. It’s always best when good people stand up and tell the meanie rottens, to just be quiet now. Having an opinion, doesn’t give you the right to hit people with it.

  128. The fabulous jennifer allegedly said:

    thanks lady!! i read katy’s post last week and was feeling very much the same way about a few people in blog-land and in the 3D world…but had been keeping quiet. i’m very glad that the bunch of you have said all that i wanted to say for a while. maybe some of these rude ones will slink back into their corners soon.

  129. The fabulous annie toy allegedly said:

    I normally “shy away” (not that I’m all that shy) from commenting after the 60th comment. I’m thinking…”lost in the shuffle”. But, I am really…WHEEELLY glad that you posted your positive comments. I don’t consider myself a “Pollyanna” but, I try my best to look at the glass half full. Opinions… I try to keep those positive too. And, some have said that “its THEIR blog they can say what they want”…in the name of saying an opinion. I guess there is freedom of speech…yet, it seems wrong (to me, anyway)to be so free with one’s speech that it hurts someone’s feelings. I don’t sleep good at night…if, I’m aware that I’ve hurt someone, and not apologized. Okay…now, MY girls have a bit more room in their bra…lol hugZ, annie aka rubyslipperz106.blogspot

  130. The fabulous Eileen allegedly said:

    I think I love you!

  131. The fabulous Nadine Woodraska allegedly said:

    I seriously love you!!

  132. The fabulous Marlene allegedly said:

    I’ve not read your blog before today but I love the way you think. Nice matters and it matters a lot. You said it very well! I have now added you to my reader - I want to see what you’re making and where you’re going and inside your house and I want to show you all those things as well. :) I’m thankful for polite, inspiring bloggers. blessings, marlene

  133. The fabulous sparklesax allegedly said:

    Life out loud, with love. Thanks!

  134. The fabulous Lemon Tree Tami allegedly said:

    Great post Monica! Oh, and thank you, thank you, thank you for changing your settings for Google Reader. I just came home from a trip to the beach and was catching up on my blogs and was pleasantly surprised to see your entire post. Very cool!

  135. The fabulous Pam allegedly said:

    Dear MSS! I told Amanda and I repeat it here, I so resent the cliche “oh, don’t take it PERSONALLY” what the hell do they mean??? I AM A PERSON. So thanks dear Monica for putting the awesome Zombie Stamp of Authenticity on the topic. World Piece! Xo Pam in Chico

  136. The fabulous Sandy allegedly said:

    Amen and Right On - Spread love and encouragement I say (especially as I am a newbie). Thanks Monica for putting everything I was thinking so perfectly.

  137. The fabulous Narelle allegedly said:

    OMG, i saw that number plate, looked at the street name and thought I know that place!! It’s my old home town. I think I also know who owns that vehicle, a well known machine quilter by the name of Clair Fairless. I love reading your blog, it always makes me smile, keep it up.

  138. The fabulous Lori allegedly said:

    This was great. I’ve been toying with starting my own sewing/cooking/photography blog and you’ve listed the exact reasons why….and the exact reasons why not….that have crossed my mind. The why’s seem to be in the lead. Thanks for taking the time to share this!

  139. The fabulous Debbie allegedly said:

    Excellent post! Well written, timely and I couldn’t agree with you more. Thanks for the reminder on leaving a comment. I find that often I may have a comment and don’t bother leaving them. Often times I find that the blogging software makes leaving a comment so difficult that I get discouraged and quit.

    And good to know — my garage looks just like yours!

  140. The fabulous Bette allegedly said:

    I subscribe to several quilt/design blogs and am unaware of the negativity and rudeness you mention. There is a way to disagree and still be polite. If a blogger HAS a comment section,then she/he should be prepared to get some negative feedback (politely of course)…..you cant please everyone. There wouldnt be much point of even HAVING a comment section if all you expected was glowing praise. It’s like fishing for compliments. If you’re going to open a dialog, with a comment section,then expect to hear all sides (with respect, of course!)

  141. The fabulous Tabitha O. allegedly said:

    Oh my gosh I must have been totally oblivious these past couple weeks as I deal with that STUFF I told you about but I am sorry I depend on crafters, quilters, fabric lovers and sewists for my positives and can’t wait to get to quilt market!!

    I shall smite those bad vibe people with a virtual smacking to the back of the head SWAT!

    Been saying for years I need to get a ‘Bite Me’ shirt that I can wear something similar to those RELAX shirts GIANT BLACK LETTERS LOL LOL or perhaps something that says ‘back off I do run with scissors’ lol

  142. The fabulous Karin allegedly said:

    Props to you, Monica, for this brilliant post. It’s a crazy world out there. I agree, why can’t we just be nice?

  143. The fabulous nellie dean allegedly said:

    What a great post! I started a blog last year then got ‘blogfright’ because I thought it wasn’t good enough. Wasn’t witty, wasn’t written well enough, I don’t have a perfect home to show off, I don’t get up at the crack of dawn to tidy the house. So I got scared and have only just come back. It still doesn’t look very pretty but I’m having a go and it feels good!

  144. The fabulous Heather allegedly said:

    The most exciting thing for me in this post was learning that you’ve switched to full feed for those of us using feed readers! I’d been using a convoluted work-around to get a full feed and, to tell you the truth, even though it works, partial feeds leave a bad taste in my mouth leaving me conflicted because you have such a great blog!

    Thanks so much for making your most excellent blog a full feed one and for relieving my bit of discontent.

  145. The fabulous Sarah allegedly said:

    Wonderful post Monica,

    I wrote yesterday to get some wiggle room in my bra too !!

  146. The fabulous Alison Marie allegedly said:

    I have to thank you for two things: this EXCELLENT post (even the comments make for great reading), and for fixing the Google feed reader ,cuz now I can get more Happy Zombie time easily!

  147. The fabulous Evelyn allegedly said:

    Monica - I just wanted to say THANK YOU for fixing your feed so that the whole things shows up in my reader. Yay!! And good on you for all the positivity - you’re so right!

  148. The fabulous Ter'e allegedly said:

    As you said, when you referred to a “real shit bomb” —– one hit one of my rughooking buddies a couple weeks back!
    I wonder if her “friend” and yours are the same people.

    People are so petty and jealous of others…………..jeesh……………live and let live, that’s my motto.

    xoxoxoxoxox Monica - your rock.

  149. The fabulous Ter'e allegedly said:

    WHOOPSIE!!!! My DH was talking to me!
    That should read YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!

  150. The fabulous Shannon allegedly said:

    LOVE THIS POST!! Great job! So that should be the new thing being passed around in the blog world: Keepin’ it Polite!!

  151. The fabulous Megan allegedly said:

    BRAVO Zombie!!! I often wonder if in the spirit of ‘keepin’ it real’ some posters didn’t heed their momma’s advice of ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!’ My momma was quite a woman and the ONLY safe place to open your mouth was talking to her in the bathroom! Thanx sweetie for ‘keepin’ it real’!

  152. The fabulous suesue allegedly said:

    hooray for niceness and how “your momma taught you better”!

  153. The fabulous Barbara allegedly said:

    Bravo and amen. Love your work and blog. Don’t quilt, but love the color and appreciate the crafts(wo)manship. rock on.

  154. The fabulous Gigi Minor allegedly said:

    I love nice people and try to surround myself with the nicest bunch in real life and online! I really had no idea there was a bunch of haters out there….it is just sad that people have to put others “down in order to bring themselves “up”. Don’t they know “The Golden Rules” poster seen in about every Kindergarten Class on the face of the planet!! Jeeze…
    Here’s to Keeping it real and Being Respectful of others!
    Cheers and Big hugs,

  155. The fabulous maryc allegedly said:

    Wow! Great post and much needed. Unfortunately, those that need to read it most will probably skip right over to go find one with more to criticize. I am just old enough (or Southern enough) to remember when manners and kindness were expected behaviors and their were ramifications if you didn’t adhere. I don’t think some current posters ever learned, “If you don’t have something nice to say, say nothing.” Love your blog - keep up the good zen!

  156. The fabulous paula w allegedly said:

    Great post Monica - being a new sewer/quilter and very new to the community of this craft I found the banter back and forth very discerning. I just left a craft [scrapbooking] that was very much like this - in fact it’s one of the reasons I left.
    One of the things that attracted me to the quilting community was the mutual respect that I initially experienced. I hope this isn’t the start to the end.

  157. The fabulous Jeanette allegedly said:

    Well said. I was always taught “if you can’t say something nice then don’t say anything at all”. Seems like this sort of thing isn’t taught anymore. Happy Stitching,

  158. The fabulous Sharon allegedly said:

    Wow! I didn’t know all this was going on. I rarely read comments - only make them. But “Amen, Sister!!”. I sometimes think that kind of negativity is like acid & I do not direct that comment to anyone directly. Bye

  159. The fabulous Magoo allegedly said:

    wow, i had no idea of rudeness in the craftie world of blogland. i didn’t think people who loved fabric could be mean. i mean really, doesn’t that seem impossible! thanks so much for setting everyone str8!! :)

  160. The fabulous jilly allegedly said:

    I have been quilting for well over 20 years, crafting even longer. NEVER in all those years have I come across such meanness as I have in the quilt blogging world. I just shake my head in disblief. No one person can solve all the world problems, but with all the problems in the world, do we quilters really need to be so darn petty about fabric choices or styles? I make quilts to make others happy and warm. Post like the one you referred to only give quilters a bad name.

    blessings, jilly
    still shaking my head

  161. The fabulous Karen a/k/a/ TheLazyQuilter allegedly said:

    You are so awesome!

  162. The fabulous wishes, true and kind allegedly said:

    Go, Monica! I love “keeping it polite”!

  163. The fabulous Nancy allegedly said:

    I love the Zombie list - like a great bug virtual hug :) xo

  164. The fabulous Nancy allegedly said:

    Edit that to say big - not bug - ha!

  165. The fabulous Sandie allegedly said:

    Thanks so much for standing up and letting your voice be heard! Sounds like Internetlandia is like a lot of the guilds out there.Too sad, when there is so much we can share with, and learn from one another

  166. The fabulous Jil allegedly said:

    As I’ve always taught my daughter and her friends, “Manners are free and soap is cheap.” I’ve always felt the working with fabric is so enjoyable because it’s so forgiving and people shine with different hues and shades just like the colors they are working with. Using good manners and supporting one another is paramount to both our craft and our personalities are creative beings. I applaud you Monica in bringing this to light and reminding us all to “pay it forward” with each other so that we all can achieve the excellence we envision at our machines. Muah Monica!!

  167. The fabulous amber allegedly said:

    There should be a button for “Just Keepin’ It Polite”. I like it. I like your post and I agree. :) Have a great day!

  168. The fabulous cathy allegedly said:

    Maybe it was a long winter! Let’s hope it’s over. I love your blog by the by. It routinely makes me laugh out loud. Cheers, Cathy

  169. The fabulous grace aka katmom allegedly said:

    Hey Monica, I so agree.,.,
    I prefer “keeping it polite” over ‘keeping it real’….hands down!
    p.s. brought ya a lil someting back from Germany…I will have it off in the mail by the end of this week….
    keeping it fun….

  170. The fabulous Pinky allegedly said:

    ha ha :) didn’t realise that you had family over this side of the world! :) love the number plate - love the post even more :)

  171. The fabulous Lori Holt allegedly said:

    Well what a breath of fresh air this post is Monica.
    You hit the nail right on the head.
    Nice matters.
    I’ll add my AMEN to the list:)
    I can’t wait till you get here girl!!!
    See you soon…

  172. The fabulous deb allegedly said:

    wow…maybe I wont stop quilting after all…having just been a victim of this,,your post made my day!!! Hooray for YOU!!!!!!!

  173. The fabulous Deb allegedly said:

    Hey, thanks for #6! I didn’t know you could change it, but I’m glad you did!

  174. The fabulous Connie allegedly said:

    Thank you for calling these rude ones to the mat. I read a “Keeping it Real” post recently that asked for people to “keep it real” with their posts that day also. I was so disturbed by it. The blatant calling out by name of designers, specific patterns, etc. I will not read her blog again. And I was enjoying it up till then. I, like alot of others read quilt blogs to escape the crap in the world and to see beautiful works of art. A sort of safehaven. I can’t help but feel jaded. I’m so happy to see that others are not going to accept this behavior either. Sorry for ranting, I feel much better :) Xoxoxo to all here and especially to you Monica!

  175. The fabulous Leona allegedly said:

    The two blogs I read faithfully are yours and Pam Kitty Morning. I think the reason they both appeal to me is that there is no pretense, no vanity, and lots of the right kind of “keepin’ it real”.

  176. The fabulous Lynne allegedly said:

    I agree. Why can’t everyone just BE-HAVED?

  177. The fabulous Angela allegedly said:

    Love this post, everything about it! Preach it sister, you are dead on. :)

  178. The fabulous Joanne allegedly said:

    Was forwarded your blog by a friend and this post is exactly what I was trying to say in a post a few back (just didn’t have the words as nice as yours!) Blogs are for sharing and helping and if one thing I do can inspire or help someone than that’s great and if I’m not their cup of tea then move on there are 100’s of wonderful blogs out there!

    Thanks to Ter’e for sending me your link! Will be reading and enjoying your blog!

  179. The fabulous Cindy Rutledge allegedly said:

    Well stated! I love the “Just keep it polite”. I will use that in the future when if I see this type of garbage.

  180. The fabulous Lisa L allegedly said:

    And this is why I love you Happy Zombie!!Let’s keep our figers crossed and hope that it makes at least one person stop and think before they say something mean to anyone!! The world would be so much better for it.

  181. The fabulous Ariane allegedly said:

    Love it!!! You said it right. I haven’t commented on any negative blog post because I didn’t want to be associated with the negativity. I love quilting, I love sharing it. I do it for myself with the hope to inspire others. I love to see new bloggers, new quilters, old quilters share. Lets keep it positive and ENCOURAGE one another. Huga Ariane

  182. The fabulous Jeni allegedly said:

    My favorite is number 10. I might have to try to get one for myself. Awesome kids!

  183. The fabulous liveacolorfullife allegedly said:

    Amen, Sister!!! Do people not remember “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”???

  184. The fabulous Shyla allegedly said:

    I love coming and reading your post I get inspired by all the blogs I read. I love seeing everyone’s craft spaces and getting ideas for mine. I don’t blog but that is only because I am very boring right now at least to me. I am a stay at home mom of a almost 6 year old boy and a 4 1/2 year old daughter I just recently went back to school to do I don’t know what yet. I am currently working on an appliqued owl quilt for a friends daughter. Thank You for blogging it is a highlight in my day when I have my time.

  185. The fabulous Kim Bates allegedly said:

    You go girl! Agree with it all!

  186. The fabulous aneela allegedly said:

    Heck I am sorry to say this Monica but it is about time someone distilled you and turned you into perfume. We could spray it over the world daily and it would be a much nicer place all said and done.

    p.s please don’t act all surprised when I come a land a massive smacker on your cheek in SLC xxx

  187. The fabulous Beverly Atkins allegedly said:

    I love your blog - can’t get enought of it. You’ll proabably never read this as it is late but don’t change a thing! I love what you do on your blog and your quilting. Thanks for letting me in!

  188. The fabulous Karen allegedly said:

    Awesome - very real and true and honest — I love it. I had been contemplating a blog although I don’t know if I’d keep up, then saw some of the icky stuff on blogs out there and backed off. Maybe I will consider again.

    I adore the pattern that Quilt Dad did - it is absolutely spectacular with the fabrics but the offset pattern is great!

  189. The fabulous Granny B. allegedly said:

    Here’s what’s real: Everyone doing what makes them passionate, helping themselves grow, become a better version of themselves from day to day. Exploring their world and learning something new and sharing what they have learned with others. UTOPIA??? probably

    I love your blog, you are so creative, thank you for sharing all your art with the rest of us. Sometimes your language is a bit high in sodium and I have to watch my salt intake on account of my blood pressure, but I take pills for that, so ROCK ON. I’ve been known to sprinkle a few grains myself.

  190. The fabulous Angie Spendlove allegedly said:

    DITTO! You rock girl - totally love you, and I don’t even know you - lol Huge thanks for being you!

  191. The fabulous Cheran allegedly said:

    you said it girl - I had read some fall out from the original post that started it all a couple of weeks ago and have been too busy to keep up lately. I am kinda surprised and disapointed that this is still going on. Let’s all just take a deep cleansing breath……in……out…… Now, press reset and go back to being nice quilters in Internetlandia.

  192. The fabulous Terri allegedly said:

    “keeping it polite”, love it! To bad way to many people don’t know what “polite” is anymore. The world sure could use a little southern charm. Love and agree with your post.

  193. The fabulous Becky L allegedly said:

    I like to blog because it’s fun. Show and tell is fun. And like you said you just never know who you might meet through it (even Donny Osmond). I sometimes wonder if it’s the anonymity that makes people think it’s OK to be mean or tasteless with their comments. Yes their name shows up on the post and you can track them down to their blog or Flickr account. It’s not having to say those mean spirited things right to someones face. Unless they live next door or down the street it’s pretty hard to meet them face to face to say HEY what is your deal? I think that allows some people to think it’s really OK to be nasty. My opinion!!! I try to live by my mom and grandma’s adage - If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.

  194. The fabulous Judith Blinkenberg allegedly said:

    I agree! Someone on Etsy said I acted shameful. The person was no longer on Etsy and gave me no other explanation. It was hurtful because I didn’t know what I had done. I’ve only bought 6 things from Etsy and these people were still on Etsy so it wasn’t them. It is better to say kind things or not say them at all. I look forward to your quilt market updates and thank you.

  195. The fabulous Emma Thomsen allegedly said:

    My own thoughts on the matter, people who post negative anything anywhere do it to get noticed - like my 4 year old son who lifts up his t shirt to show off his belly button, it’s the only way they get noticed. So remember the next time you read a negative anything they’re just showing off they’re belly button because they haven’t got anything that’s worth reading. I’m going to Blog about this post and send them right back to you - let’s share the ‘keeping it polite’ motto.

  196. The fabulous Pat allegedly said:

    Hi Monica, I don’t have a blog and I’m a “lurker” ….OMG. I enjoy reading what you very talented people share with the world.
    I’m afraid this “keepin’ it real” is today’s manners. What has happened to us that makes us so rude to each other? If I don’t like someone’s work;I still realize the hours of choosing fabrics,the cutting and piecing; all the time and effort this all takes.I would not criticize them if it were not my “cuppa” so to speak.
    You women who kindly share your pictures and ideas are brave souls. It’s easy to be a cyber bully and that is what some people are.They need to get a life, grow up and learn some manners.
    I enjoy your blog; the name attracted me,the creativity keeps me. No longer a lurker! ;-)

  197. The fabulous Kate allegedly said:

    I try to comment on a blog like I would have a conversation in someone’s home. I think it is cowardly to come on someone’s blog and say something unkind. It is usually jealousy that causes people to do this. They don’t feel well about themselves so they must find fault with someone else. Perhaps that is why I have chosen not to blog. I don’t take criticism well, especially from strangers. I am so glad for all the beautiful blogs to read and I have learned so much and gotten some really good recipes from them. Plus, I learn about all the new, wonderful fabrics that will be coming on the market. So keep it up all you bloggers. There are people out here who really appreciate you and love you and would miss you if you stopped blogging.

  198. The fabulous Ruth Fidino allegedly said:

    Well said Monica. Glad the girls are happy.

  199. The fabulous Sharon allegedly said:

    Well said — why make everything so intimidating to us novice quilters out here. Can’t we all just play nice?

  200. The fabulous Busy Little Quilter allegedly said:

    I love you, Monica! Thanks for caring about all of us.

    When I first started blogging, you were one of the first blogs I visited. It was during the Adventures of Miss Kitty (or something like that). Anyway, you had a list of bloggy manners on your sidebar. Although many were manners that we’re supposed to use every day, some were ones I didn’t know about when it came to blogging. I think it would be a good idea for you to post those on your sidebar, again. :) It’s too bad that there are bully’s in blogland. Thank you for standing up for all of us.

  201. The fabulous Aileen allegedly said:

    I haven’t encountered the ugly you describe, thank goodness. I am not a blogger, but I do visit crafting blogs regularly and I am always blown away by the generosity and creativity that I see. Bloggers blow me away, spending time and energy sharing their work, processes and thoughts. Complaining or criticizing is just soooo clueless!! I don’t love everything I see, but so what? We a have different tastes and interests.

    Speaking if which, it is time I mentioned how much I love your blog, your work and your line of fabric. I also follow you on Pinterest. I also love your blog’s name! So, thank you for the hundreds of hours you have spent in sharing your immense creativity, humor and style!!

  202. The fabulous Donna allegedly said:

    I love your Machine, it is so cute!!

    I’m also of the “say nothing unless it’s a positive”

Farting around with needle & thread and then blogging about it.

Monica Solorio-Snow
Happy Zombie

Pacific Wonderland
Astoria, Oregon

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